Growing up, my sister and I were on our own when it came to homework. My mom had to work and my grandfather, who watched us after school, didn’t make it past the fourth grade. So we did our own work, and then when my mother would get home, she’d quickly check it over and help us correct anything that was out of whack.

As far as special projects went, we always did well, but I used to resent the prize-winning science fair kids who had fancy computer print-outs to go with their projects (a big deal back then in the days before having a home computer became the norm), or intricate displays with way too many moving parts for a first-grader to have conceived on their own. In short, even then, I could always tell which kids had parents who did their homework for them.

Now as a parent, I’m fortunate enough to be home in the afternoon to supervise J.J.’s homework time, and I’ve made a promise to myself that I’m going to let my kids do their own work. This is no easy task sometimes. I tend to be a tad on the perfectionist side, so it’s hard for me to let my son paste a picture in his homework book crooked. It takes a lot of willpower on my part to not go find a picture that rhymes with “red” (which would take me 30 seconds), and instead let J.J. leaf through a magazine until he finds a “bed” (which could take 10 minutes). But most of all, it’s hard for me not to take over an art project that I know will be hung up in the classroom next to 15 other parent-perfected masterpieces.

So far, the homework has been reasonable. I’m sure the day will come when he’ll be given assignments that are a bit over the top, and I may have to intervene in some way. And I will to a point. But here’s the thing: I know that if I let my son do the majority of his work on his own, he’ll learn what it feels like to accomplish something (and what a feeling that is!). I also know that the math problems he’s practicing will sink in faster if he’s not using me as his crutch. If I let him cut and paste and practice penmanship without holding his hand steady for him, his teacher will surely know that I didn’t do it for him. And I’m OK with that.

What’s your take on homework? How much help do you offer? Share in the comments below!

-Dawn Papandrea

There was so much anticipation to the start of the school year, that once it started, it seems to be steamrolling by. We’re nearly a month in, and what began as excitement and chaos is now slowing turning into the daily grind.

But of course, just as our children are learning  new things everyday, I’m finding that as we move along, I’m picking up new tricks to keep things organized, help keep my son excited about schoolwork and homework (not easy!), and manage to get out of the house on time in the morning.

If you’re finding it hard to stay in the  your groove, I came across some great tips that’ll help, courtesy of Dr. Mary Mokris, education specialist for Kumon Math and Reading Centers.

Praise your children daily. Let them know that you believe in them, you think they are special and you have confidence in them. In our home, we celebrate on Friday afternoons if my son behaved all week at school, that is, with a trip to the ice cream parlor or some other fun activity. It gives him an incentive to listen, but also lets him know that working hard makes me proud.

Focus on the positives. Reflect on the new skills they are gaining that are needed to be successful in life, such as independence, responsibility, perseverance and time management. I have to do this a lot. My son inherited my perfectionist tendencies (poor little guy), so he tends to be hard on himself if a picture doesn’t come out just right or if he can’t quite master a new skill. Praise, praise, praise really helps.

Set up a study area for your child. Create an area that is well-ventilated and well-lit. Be sure it’s equipped with all necessary supplies. For me, it’s pencils, crayons, construction paper, and scissors. Older kids will need a dictionary, their computer, etc.  Most important, no distractions allowed! That means no TV, phone, or instant messaging during homework.

Establish a consistent homework routine from the start. What works for us so far is coming home, washing up, snack (he’s usually famished), then homework. As soon as my son is finished, then he gets to watch some TV or play. No matter when you fit homework in, the idea is to help children see that it is a priority in your home.

Get acquainted with your child’s teachers and keep the communication open. Teachers are so busy at the beginning of the year getting to know their new students. And often, they don’t meet the parents until weeks later at open school night. This year, I made it a point to ask for a quick meeting with my son’s teacher right away. I wanted to get to know her, and stay on top of my son’s progress. I’m so against the idea that teachers are adversaries — we have to do our best to work with the teacher.

Parents, what are your tips and tricks to stay on track now that back-to-school excitement has worn off? Share in the comments below.

-Dawn Papandrea